It's funny how my writings resurface long after I've written them. This one was written on 14.02.2005. And I didn't even know this one existed till the person it was with showed it to me.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Maiden Live!!!
While you enjoyed your goody goody saturday evening, I saw Maiden perform live.
More comes up later.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Friday, March 02, 2007
Confession 14
For the very first time, I feel I am wrong. About life and everything concievable.
Heading nowhere, wandering aimlessly.
Knowing what I want from life is not enough, it's knowing how to do it that makes all the difference. Lacking the means to go about getting what I wanted was never a serious handicap. Until now, that is.
Is it my fault?
Maybe.
I was told to dream big. I was promised happiness if I did this and this and that and that. I pulled strings, pushed people around, twisted contexts, made my way around, begun the climb to the top. What more could I do? Skulls and possibly lives crushed 'neath my feet. I admit, I made my mistakes. But I learnt my lessons too.
As the saying goes, the higher you are, the harder you fall.
Forgive me father, for I have sinned.
Till today evening, I never knew I could feel this lonely. It's an interesting feeling though. Maybe the mist had to cover all 'round. It's never unbearable. But it wasn't unexpected either.
There was no reassuring hand back then. Now, it's different. All that was between the two time-periods were fragile words. Words of influence that contort the mind. You never know when these words will shatter a life into sharp shards, like a thousand fragments of glass.
"The good that men do is oft interred with their bones, but the evil that men do lives on."
How true. Where has the warrior gone? Has he made way for the moral-less assassin who butchers innocence?
I love experimenting with all sorts of things. Today, it was ice-cream. And when I did speak out to place my order (Rum and Raisin, with orange sauce), the guy at the counter actually fell down laughing. A part of me would've initiated verbal warfare. But it's good that I didn't.
I'd hurt myself enough. I was in no mood to hurt anyone else today.
As I smoked my last installment for the day and sipped my half-tea, I saw a group of 6 deaf-and-dumb college students. They were sipping tea, smoking and wearing college-bags and living life as normally as they possibly could.
Handicaps can be overcome.
Yet I feel my identity fast dissolving, like Rum and Raisin ice-cream in orange sauce.
I will all my bitterness away.
Heading nowhere, wandering aimlessly.
Knowing what I want from life is not enough, it's knowing how to do it that makes all the difference. Lacking the means to go about getting what I wanted was never a serious handicap. Until now, that is.
Is it my fault?
Maybe.
I was told to dream big. I was promised happiness if I did this and this and that and that. I pulled strings, pushed people around, twisted contexts, made my way around, begun the climb to the top. What more could I do? Skulls and possibly lives crushed 'neath my feet. I admit, I made my mistakes. But I learnt my lessons too.
As the saying goes, the higher you are, the harder you fall.
Forgive me father, for I have sinned.
Till today evening, I never knew I could feel this lonely. It's an interesting feeling though. Maybe the mist had to cover all 'round. It's never unbearable. But it wasn't unexpected either.
There was no reassuring hand back then. Now, it's different. All that was between the two time-periods were fragile words. Words of influence that contort the mind. You never know when these words will shatter a life into sharp shards, like a thousand fragments of glass.
"The good that men do is oft interred with their bones, but the evil that men do lives on."
How true. Where has the warrior gone? Has he made way for the moral-less assassin who butchers innocence?
I love experimenting with all sorts of things. Today, it was ice-cream. And when I did speak out to place my order (Rum and Raisin, with orange sauce), the guy at the counter actually fell down laughing. A part of me would've initiated verbal warfare. But it's good that I didn't.
I'd hurt myself enough. I was in no mood to hurt anyone else today.
As I smoked my last installment for the day and sipped my half-tea, I saw a group of 6 deaf-and-dumb college students. They were sipping tea, smoking and wearing college-bags and living life as normally as they possibly could.
Handicaps can be overcome.
Yet I feel my identity fast dissolving, like Rum and Raisin ice-cream in orange sauce.
I will all my bitterness away.
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